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Lynne Santiago MS, LMHC

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A Guy's Guide to Gals on Giving Amazing Oral Sex

    Posted by John Fidi on 01/18/2007

On one hand, I write this article from a selfish standpoint. The more women who are out there giving oral sex with confidence, the better chance I stand at getting it. On the other hand, I am doing this to help women who are too shy to ask and want to feel more confident with their sexual skills. While some women will see this as merely a refresher course in the basics, many others will enjoy putting this advice (not the kind you get from a friend) to good use. Okay, ready? Read on.

1. The mental game
We all know that sex and orgasms are 90% mental, even for men, so your mindset and the impression you give your boyfriend must be, "I love your penis and I love giving you head." Seems simple enough, but this first step is usually the downfall of most women. If you give the impression that giving oral sex is a chore, a favor, or in some way not pleasurable for you, it takes so much away from the experience. If he thinks, "She wants me in her mouth," you've got him. This is where he has to be mentally, and you have to get him there, no matter how much you have to act. Dirty talk doesn't hurt either.

2. No teeth

The teeth can never touch the penis. Period. You need to use your lips and tongue. Any contact with teeth -- even one tooth -- is distracting and may be painful.

3. Taking it in

Yes, it is always nice when a woman can take your entire penis in her mouth, but it is not essential. You need to take in at least half of the shaft (unless he's huge and then 1/3 is okay). The sensitive area is the head of the penis, but you need to be able to go up and down the shaft, taking the penis in and almost out. The tongue should be gently gliding along the shaft. The lips should be firm, but not too firm, allowing for their tender touch too.

4. Rhythm and variety
While taking the penis in and almost out of your mouth, you need to find a rhythm that seems pleasurable to your man. This will vary with the individual. Slowly in and out can be exciting, just as fast and furious can be. While not disturbing this rhythm at any key moments, it is important to vary your approach. Occasionally take the penis out of your mouth (completely) and lick up and down the shaft lightly, then put it back in and begin again. Sometimes take it out and just lick the head of the penis, then back in. Be creative.

5. Lending a hand
Most men like to be simultaneously stimulated by the hand and the mouth. Just hold the penis at the bottom of the shaft and use your mouth up and down, getting in to a rhythm like you are giving him a hand job into your mouth. The hand is also a good way to hide just how much of the penis you are taking in your mouth.

6. The end game

Well, some of you are not going to like hearing this, but swallowing is really important. It is so erotic for a guy to ejaculate in a woman's mouth -- it takes the experience to a completely new level. No making faces, no saying "yuck" (remember step one). If you just cannot do it, then a reasonable alternative is to allow the guy to ejaculate on your body, somewhere. That can be just as erotic.

And Remember Practice Makes Perfect!

 



SOURCE: J.K. Truitti, Love & Sex Contributor, iVillage.com

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